The Audience Won't Like It
Married hosts Rob and Leslie Shoecraft invite you into their closet (literally) for a podcast that’s equal parts nostalgia trip, music nerd-out, and absurd banter. Born from a joke about how the audience probably won’t like it, the show leans into that spirit—riffing on everything from Star Trek episodes and Kitty Wells deep cuts, to feet, crockpots, and cover songs that live on YouTube thanks to copyright.
Each week, the conversation drifts like two people killing time in line for a concert—unexpected, hilarious, and sometimes strangely profound. Future episodes explore growing up in the 80s and 90s, The Dollhouse Murders, “5 of 5” and borrowed chords in music theory, bodybuilding meal prep, Wu-Tang Clan, Gordon Lightfoot, Alan Thicke, Herb Alpert, and whatever other rabbit holes pop up along the way.
If you like side tangents, forgotten pop culture, and covers of songs your mom might love, you might just find that you do like it after all.
The Audience Won't Like It
Ep 3 - Neo Geo to Herb Alpert: nostalgia, mischief, and the art of finding music before the internet
Two elder millennials trade banter for memory and map a world where plans were made in person, arcades ate quarters, payphones served as checkpoints, and music discovery took legwork and liner notes. The path winds to Herb Alpert, The Wrecking Crew, and how simple, pretty melodies still win.
• the Terry Box as a handmade anchor for conversation and craft
• arcades, Neo Geo myths, quarter Tuesdays, and co-op boss fights
• payphones, untracked freedom, and the art of waiting
• sleepovers powered by Girl Talk books and dares
• showing up unannounced, cul-de-sac games, and risky clubhouses
• discovering music at record shops, radio patterns, and Wilburys adjacency
• Herb Alpert’s studio method, A&M Records, and The Wrecking Crew
• why slow discovery made songs and friendships stick
📺 Watch this episode on our YouTube Channel!
This is also where you can watch our covers of the songs we discuss.
👉 youtube.com/@TheAudienceWontLikeIt
Hey, we're on.
SPEAKER_05:Good afternoon.
SPEAKER_01:Good afternoon.
SPEAKER_05:Welcome back.
SPEAKER_01:Could be any time at all.
SPEAKER_05:It could be, but it is afternoon.
SPEAKER_01:It's always afternoon somewhere.
SPEAKER_05:Pretty late afternoon, actually.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. How do you feel about that?
SPEAKER_05:Brings nothing but terror and fear as the day progresses and tonight.
SPEAKER_01:Just say it's Sunday morning coming down.
SPEAKER_05:I don't actually know what the lyrics are to that song, so.
SPEAKER_01:That is the name of the song, right?
SPEAKER_05:Another Sunday morning coming down.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, morning. Oh.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. You said morning.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I did.
SPEAKER_05:I think so.
SPEAKER_01:I meant afternoon. Hey, this is the uh another episode of The Audience Won't Like It. The audience will never ever want to kiss it on the lips.
SPEAKER_05:No, they will not. We do have a special guest joining us today.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, we do?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, who?
SPEAKER_05:Our Terry Box.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, Terry Box. Uh, for those who can't see it at home. Sorry. Yeah. Or in the car.
SPEAKER_05:I please don't watch YouTube while you're driving. If you're the one driving.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. You don't want to get sick to your uh tummy.
SPEAKER_05:Your stomach and wreck because of your sickness in your belly.
SPEAKER_01:You do not.
SPEAKER_05:No. But anyway, back to the Terry Box.
SPEAKER_01:Uh yeah, so we have a Terry box here. Um for those who are unfamiliar with what that is, uh how many people would you say are familiar with what that is?
SPEAKER_05:I'm gonna go with maybe 10%.
SPEAKER_01:Of humanity? Yeah. Okay. Terry box. That's fair.
SPEAKER_05:At least one we know at least one person, maybe three that might be familiar with the Terry Box.
SPEAKER_01:Do you remember if I were to just throw the word boo-boo box out? I guess that's three words. That's a two.
SPEAKER_05:I don't know.
SPEAKER_01:It's a hyphenite of one word.
SPEAKER_05:I don't know what that is, though.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Well, it's from a movie.
SPEAKER_05:Boo-boo box. It was like Tommy Boy or some other movie.
SPEAKER_01:No, no, no. Same era, maybe just a little bit before. Also, here's another hint. It has nothing at all to do with this podcast.
SPEAKER_05:Hmm. What does have to do with this podcast?
SPEAKER_01:Um Nostalgia.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, you mean today's episode?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, and uh Tijuana Brass. Okay. Herbalpert.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01:Lady Fingers. But the boo-boo box, it's from Hook.
SPEAKER_05:Oh. Remember when the guy don't remember the boo-boo box at all.
SPEAKER_01:The boo-boo box was terrifying.
SPEAKER_05:Was it?
SPEAKER_01:I thought it was a little I thought that was a little much. That was a little bit like sawish.
SPEAKER_05:Let me, I was gonna say, is that the box of things that he could attach instead of his hook?
SPEAKER_01:No, no, no, no, no. I wouldn't be that upset about that.
SPEAKER_05:Oh.
SPEAKER_01:No, there was a guy, there was a guy who was uh maybe just a dash treasonous.
SPEAKER_05:Was it like a excuse me everyone's sorry? Was it like a chokey?
SPEAKER_01:Kind of like the chokey. Okay. I would say worse though, they put him in a really, really small box, like a treasure box chest, some say. And then they put scorpions in there with them.
SPEAKER_05:Wow, I feel like I haven't even seen this.
SPEAKER_01:For all we know, they just left him there forever.
SPEAKER_05:He's still in there.
SPEAKER_01:He might be.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Because I don't know, do they age? They kind of live forever. Yeah, I mean, they're if you think about it, that is a horrific scene.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. I actually can't think about it because all I remember is the mermaids kissing him underwater and wishing that I could look like that.
SPEAKER_01:Look like Robert Williams getting kissed by mermaids. Yeah. Me too.
SPEAKER_05:With his flowing hair.
SPEAKER_01:Remember uh the mermaids in uh in the animated series classic?
SPEAKER_05:We were just trying to drown her. See. See.
SPEAKER_01:I love that. Anyways. Terry box. Terry box. The Terry box that we have here is made by With Love. With with love.
SPEAKER_05:From a dear friend.
SPEAKER_01:Terry from our good friend Terry.
SPEAKER_05:The boy Terry. The boy kind.
SPEAKER_01:Not my mom kind.
SPEAKER_05:Right.
SPEAKER_01:Uh, Y kind, not an I kind. And uh he was a client of mine in the dear friend, still is a dear friend, not a client. He's a human, by the way. Not a deer. D-E-A-R. Yeah. T E R R Y.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. There's a lot of ways to spell the words we're using.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. Yes. What's the word for that?
SPEAKER_05:Oh no. I'm not gonna know. Sound the same, spell different. It's not hi I'm not gonna think of it right now. Me neither. It'll come to me in a stroke of genius later. All that kind of stuff.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Oh, I just thought of something else.
SPEAKER_05:What?
SPEAKER_01:What's it called when there's a word that's like left tenant and lieutenant? Where never mind.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Cut this.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Cut it. What do you mean?
SPEAKER_05:This is good. We don't edit though.
SPEAKER_01:This is good.
SPEAKER_05:So anyway, welcome back to another episode of the colour. So our Terry Boxer. Oh, right, sorry, the Terry box. You took so long explaining it. I thought that the moment had passed.
SPEAKER_01:The Terry box, okay. Well let me get to the point, guys. Leslie.
SPEAKER_05:I will stop talking.
SPEAKER_01:Thank you. Gosh. So a Terry box is a box that is made by has to be made by Terry. It could be made by either a man or woman named Terry.
SPEAKER_05:Terry just says something.
SPEAKER_01:If my mom made this, we'd be calling it the same thing. Spelling it a little differently.
SPEAKER_05:You might be calling it a grandma terry box, though.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that's true. Or tabby.
unknown:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Depending on the ground. Tabby box.
SPEAKER_01:She's gonna make one though.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:It's gonna be like her thing. Anyways, uh, what you could do with this uh tabby box is uh first of all, it's made with like 19-inch wood. This thing's like 7,000 pounds. Um but I can clamp my mic, well, we can clamp our mics to it. We're having mics fall all over the place.
SPEAKER_05:It was originally created for working out like a step platform or right?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, you can make it's a step, you can put like 25-pound weights in here, and you could do heavy like rear foot elevated split squats or Bulgarian split squats, if you will.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, you mean so it doesn't slide?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I was thinking, I was trying to imagine how you would pick up the weights, how you would pick up the box without the weights falling out. Because there's it's not a closed box.
SPEAKER_01:What, put it on your back?
SPEAKER_05:Well, you said you could put heavy weights in it and then do and then Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:You could put heavy um bottles of mustard. Pigs, like super small, like pig parts. You could put like really small pig parts.
SPEAKER_05:Dense pigs.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, or artificial pigs made of lead.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:But I wouldn't recommend putting anything else in the Tebby box, especially scorpions.
SPEAKER_05:We don't have a Tebby box. That's to be This is a Terry box. This is a Terry box. Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. So today, so the premise of the show that we stick to We do stick to it. Yeah, we do. This is what conversations are like with me in line. And would you talk like this to a stranger?
SPEAKER_05:So I'm a little bit more self-aware.
SPEAKER_01:I'd be a little I'd be a little jealous, I think, if you just hit it off with this kind of ebb and flow with a strange man.
SPEAKER_05:Well, you know, I I have a lot of red flag uh alarms that get triggered by the case. The gift gift of fear kind of stuff. Yes. Yeah. So I can't imagine having this level of comfort with a stranger. For example, previous episode, I would never want to talk to anyone about their feet. Ever.
SPEAKER_01:No one? Not even if you're a podiatrist, I wouldn't have to be a good one. Who had the same exact problem you did and wanted to walk you through it from a personal standpoint.
SPEAKER_05:Why do you be touching my feet?
SPEAKER_01:Eventually. No. It's possible. Nope. Eventually, you're wearing sandals, it's hot. They're like, hey, I know this is.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, listen. You're really selling it.
SPEAKER_01:You're making it sound like it's impossible.
SPEAKER_05:But let me touch them.
SPEAKER_01:They wouldn't say it like that. They're professional.
SPEAKER_05:That's what I would hear though, because that's the message that they would be sending nonverbally.
unknown:Hmm.
SPEAKER_05:You always have to watch out for this.
SPEAKER_01:We may have to do a whole we may have to do an entire episode on this.
SPEAKER_05:You gotta watch out for your nonverbal messages.
SPEAKER_01:That's true. That's true.
SPEAKER_05:All you podiatrists in line out there.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, don't make people feel uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_05:So we're in line for a concert to see.
SPEAKER_01:Uh to see Herb Alpert.
SPEAKER_05:So tell me, I thought his name was Herb Albert, but it's not. It's it's not herp.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I know it's spelled with a P.
SPEAKER_05:I've always said it's not herp, though, it's herb.
SPEAKER_01:Herb.
SPEAKER_05:Not herp, like we got herp.
SPEAKER_01:Not like herp C.
SPEAKER_05:Right. Herpetitis C. I think herpes is close to Herpetitis C. Herpes, just herpes.
SPEAKER_01:Herpes, but the fool like a podiatrist would say herpes titus C.
SPEAKER_05:Herpes titus. And then it's Albert with a P sound.
SPEAKER_01:What if what if the podiatrist What if the podiatrist wasn't gonna touch your feet and hadn't didn't give you any signals that he was, but he had obvious herpes. Would you talk to him? I for long.
SPEAKER_05:What is the obvious herpes? Like a rubber like cold sores all over his mouth?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, and he's rubbing he's rubbing around.
SPEAKER_05:No, I wouldn't. I would have to find a new place in line to stand.
SPEAKER_01:And and he's wearing sandals, and you could see somehow.
SPEAKER_05:Nope.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Okay. Nope. I've seen it.
SPEAKER_01:Would you just leave? Because Herb Alpert, he's still alive, but I wouldn't leave, but like, are we in line like in We're outside.
SPEAKER_05:Turnstyle queue type lines, or is it like a big crowd just waiting for the doors to open and you're gonna funnel in?
SPEAKER_01:It's a crowd. Okay, then yes, I'll kind of go into our own.
SPEAKER_05:I wouldn't leave the concert. I would just move to it. Okay. I'm sorry, I'll let you talk. Yeah. I would just move to a new place in the crowd.
SPEAKER_01:Oh no, no, no. It's a line.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, well, I just clarified that and you said it's a crowd.
SPEAKER_01:I misunderstood.
SPEAKER_05:I can't wait for you to listen to all the mistakes you've made so far today.
SPEAKER_01:It's hard to listen to what you're saying when I'm thinking about the next thing that I want to say. Oh man. We're married. My name's Leslie. My name's Rob. I'm also married to Leslie.
SPEAKER_05:I'm the wife.
SPEAKER_01:I'm the son.
SPEAKER_05:Not my son, though.
SPEAKER_01:No.
SPEAKER_05:You're a son. You're a Toby. You're a Tebby Box son.
SPEAKER_01:My name is Rob. My name is Rob Shoecraft. Wife of Leslie, son of Tebby.
SPEAKER_04:You're not my wife. Did you mean to say that?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_04:Oh.
SPEAKER_01:Of course.
SPEAKER_04:You are the son of Tebby, though.
SPEAKER_01:I'm the son of Tebby.
SPEAKER_05:All right. Anyway, we're standing in line.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we're standing in line.
SPEAKER_05:And who are we watching today?
SPEAKER_01:We both look about the same age.
SPEAKER_05:Oh give or take eleven months.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Well, yeah. Give or take eleven months. Um. And I say, hey, you remember You remember you look like you might be. Well, you actually well, I'd be I'd say like, hey, what are you? Twenty-two?
SPEAKER_05:And I would say, Hey. I'll be seeing you.
SPEAKER_01:I don't have herpes in this case, so.
SPEAKER_05:I'll be seeing ya.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, and what are you? Ma'am, I'm sorry. I are you what third when'd you graduate high school? That's how I would go to the city. Oh, that's a smart one. Yeah. Wait, when'd you graduate high school? You like a 2010? That's what I'd say.
SPEAKER_05:Oh wow. You would give me nine years. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Now it's a 2001.
SPEAKER_01:2001. Oh. No kid. I was I was 2000. Hey, do you remember what it was like when we didn't have phones? When we didn't have all the answers in the world in our hands. In our pockets. In our pockets.
SPEAKER_05:That's what I like to say at work a lot. That's what the internet's for. And then we look it up the answers.
SPEAKER_01:Me and my patients. Sometimes you get a little frustrated with me when I fact check every conversation we have.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, that gets old. It gets really old. But you the thing the types of things that I'm looking at But I know you're happy because you learned so much. Uh yeah. The types of things I'm looking up with my patients is like, how old is Willie Nelson? You know, we don't have to wonder, we could just look.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:It's a little different than some of the things that you felt the need to stop and look at your phone for. It's okay though. I'm gonna keep you.
SPEAKER_01:Thank you.
SPEAKER_05:So anyway, we're gonna talk about times before.
SPEAKER_01:Things we're nostalgic about. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So so childhood, teenager area, like independent of your parents, really, but not necessarily. Things that you used to do without phones, because there were no phones, things people don't do anymore because there are phones, that kind of thing.
SPEAKER_01:So we're clear, smartphones.
SPEAKER_05:Yes.
SPEAKER_01:Neither of us were born prior to Alexander Graham Bells.
SPEAKER_05:We were not. Not like Kitty Wells. Is it okay to make jokes from two podcasts ago when when presumably no one's listened to the It's okay?
SPEAKER_01:I think we should that's how we hook them.
SPEAKER_05:So they can go back and know why we're laughing about it.
SPEAKER_01:Make it sure our inside jokes is poor Kitty Wells. Go listen to Kitty Wells. You guys. She's great. She's got a great collection, great, authentic, beautiful voice, strong.
SPEAKER_05:So you and I are early 40s. And what's what is it that's right right around us as the millennials? We would some people say we're elder millennials.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I've never been called that.
SPEAKER_05:Well, you don't spend a lot of time on the socials. So it's we're older millennials. Um and then like my sister is more of the so there's also a category where people say exennials.
SPEAKER_01:I've heard that.
SPEAKER_05:And they say that those people had, quote, an analog childhood and a digital adulthood.
SPEAKER_01:That's accurate.
SPEAKER_05:I feel like that describes us pretty darn well because I didn't even get a cell phone. I think maybe the spring of my freshman year, but I didn't even turn it on and freshman year of college. Yeah, sorry, freshman year of college. I didn't even turn it on and use it until my sophomore year. And then it maybe rang a couple times a week.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And I got one when we were dating. So I was 20, so I was a junior. And it had a camera on it. And my voicemail. My voicemail. It was one of the first phones with a camera on it. And it my voicemail said, Yeah, it was. You reached Rob's phone slash camera.
SPEAKER_05:And we thought that was hilarious for a really long time.
SPEAKER_01:I was it wasn't so much that I thought it was hilarious. I was proud of it.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_05:It's cutting edge.
SPEAKER_01:I wanted people to just know they were trying to get a hold hold of someone who's a someone.
SPEAKER_05:And so now we have children that have had cell phones since they were eleven each. And I kind of feel like I wish we didn't live in a world where they had them. But I also feel like we have to live in a world where they gotta they gotta have one, so we might as well let them navigate it.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, might as well use the use it to your advantage. It's a tool.
SPEAKER_05:So the way that they interact and socialize is different just because of the existence of the cell phone. So I thought it'd be fun to talk about stuff from our throwbacks that were different because of that.
SPEAKER_01:Why don't you get us started?
SPEAKER_05:Well, I'd like for you to get us started because I feel like you had like 25 ideas and I had like three, which is typical for the two of us.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, well I will have to reach into my pocket and pull out my phone at some point to see what I wrote there.
SPEAKER_05:You could do that now if you want.
SPEAKER_01:Um, I'd like to just go ahead and start. I don't need to look at my phone all the time.
SPEAKER_05:No.
SPEAKER_01:Shall I?
SPEAKER_05:Go, please do.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, well, I was uh obsessed with arcades.
SPEAKER_05:See, I knew you'd have a good one to s to jump off from.
SPEAKER_01:I loved loved arcades. Like whenever we went on a vacation and stayed in a hotel, or maybe we stopped to get pizza on the way to the hotel or whatever.
SPEAKER_05:At a pizza hut?
SPEAKER_01:At a pizza hut, or like a uh what was the place out in California? It was uh nice roundtable pizza.
SPEAKER_05:Oh wow, wow.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, round table pizza had a pretty good arcade. Wow, had a lot of Neo Geo stuff in there.
SPEAKER_05:I don't know what that means.
SPEAKER_01:Uh man. Well, okay. Neo Geo, if we want to get into that. I never had one, but it's kind of I'll I'll be nostalgic about my my obsession with Neo Geo. It was always rumored that such and such, oh his he's super rich, he has a Neo Geo.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, is it a gaming system?
SPEAKER_01:It's a gaming system.
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:It's a gaming system that they that they developed.
SPEAKER_05:I can't remember who owned Neo Geo, but so when I say what's a Neo Geo, and your first answer isn't it's a gaming system.
SPEAKER_01:Do you remember that's how the 300, you start talking, and then I will be like the anchor to bring people down to understand what you're talking about.
SPEAKER_05:This is like bowling with the bumpers up.
SPEAKER_01:Oh. You're the bumpers?
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. To try to keep you on task. So anyway, Neo Geo.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Donnie doesn't need bumpers. Steve Bashimmy's character in Big Lebowski.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Anyways, so he gets strikes all the time until he dies. Oh, spoiler. Have you seen that?
SPEAKER_02:No.
SPEAKER_01:You never seen it? No. Okay, just kidding. It sucks.
SPEAKER_02:I don't care.
SPEAKER_01:I don't even remember any characters' names. Um or their bowling scores. So Neo Geo was a console. And you could have arcade quality games, quite literally, the arcade games that were in the arcades, that were Neo Geo games, they had a huge catalog, and they were great games. Like Neo Geo games are excellent.
SPEAKER_05:Can you describe the way it looked? Because I mean I when you when you say arcade, I'm thinking like a cabinet that you stand at.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, yeah, I am. I'm talking about the so you could have a console that's like just think like a like a big Genesis. I think it's kind of what they look like. I never actually knew anybody who had one. Um but you get these cards, I believe, for them. These like ROM cards, essentially. And you could you could play these games, they're about 200 bucks a piece. The console itself was$600. There's a reason nobody had them. The graphics looked like you remember how did you play enough Genesis and Super Nintendo to know that like Super Nintendo, the colors, there's there's like a bright, super bright, just forget it, forget that comparison. This the sprites. So like the video game, say a character, a baseball player. He a guy at bat would be a sprite.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:The sprites were big and they were beautiful, the sound was great for the time. The controllers were responsive because you know they're made for the arcade, so everything's super snappy, super tight. Um, and you could play this at home, and you could save, I think, your card and then go to the arcade and pick up where you left off if you're playing like the baby. Yeah, I think I think you could do that.
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:Anyways, arcades. I was upset. Yeah, oh, yeah, I didn't even get started on the arcades. I just got sidetracked with Neo Geo.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, so but well, I mean, the thing about an arcade, I ha let me just try to guess where you might be going is that you had to go to it. Right? You had to seek it out.
SPEAKER_01:That's true. Yeah, it was a brick and mortar operation. Brick and quarter operation, if you'll allow me.
SPEAKER_05:A missed opportunity. I was the only real experience with an arcade, and you're gonna laugh because this is not even an arcade, was our pizza here. And it had it had a cabinet, like a standing up one, but then the what I loved was the Pac-Man table.
SPEAKER_01:Was it Pac Man or was it Miss Pac Man?
SPEAKER_05:I did they only have a Miss Pac Man table? I don't know, because the joy of playing that Pac-Man table was actually replaced with the trauma of my sister pretending to kidnap me from said table. So all I have really in my memory is the yellow circle eating the dots.
SPEAKER_01:Didn't she put her hand over your eyes?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, she put her she came up behind me, put her her hand over my mouth, and her hand over other hand over my eyes, and then dragged me out the door.
SPEAKER_01:And I was seven years older.
SPEAKER_05:So I was probably six.
SPEAKER_01:That's pretty scary.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, and I was really upset. No one seemed to be as mad at her as I felt that they should have been. But anyway.
SPEAKER_01:What you should have done had you, you know, as all six-year-olds need jujitsu, uh, you should have dropped your weight and then reached down under your legs, like you're hiking a football, grab her closest leg and pull. Fire your hips forward. She'd be on her on her head.
SPEAKER_05:Cracked her head open.
SPEAKER_01:Yep, cracked her head wide open.
SPEAKER_05:So it makes me think that you know how when we got to restaurants and stuff, we we don't we're we're super mightier than thou, holier than thou, and we don't let our kids use their phones at restaurants for the most part. But it does make me think about being at a restaurant where they're before phones, and like the whole reason I wanted to eat a pizza hut besides getting the um Eureka's Castle puppets that came with the personal pan pizza kids' meal thing, was to play those games. And as soon as we were done eating, then we were allowed to go play the games. And I'm like, that is that was the pre here you can have the cell phone now type of a thing.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And you know, they had I think they had a claw machine, maybe. Yeah, those are too close to gambling for you.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Uh and that's not, by the way, that is not a holy or nail thing. It's just a uh it's just uh I I know the math thing, and I just as soon as I found out about as soon as I was very convinced that it's pretty much impossible to play the long game, yeah, when I basically checked out of just became disenchanted of it with it. Another thing I like That being said, sports betting is a whole different thing.
SPEAKER_05:Well, not for me.
SPEAKER_01:Stock market is another.
SPEAKER_05:The stock market, sure. I also like quarter machines, which still exist, but they're not like as ubiquitous or desirable as they were. Yeah, because you could just literally play it on your phone most of the time with the Well, I'm talking about just machines that you get a gum out of or like stick that.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, like a vending machine.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Remember do you remember the bowling alleys used to have uh cigarette vending machines?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, do you remember that restaurant that you and I ate in the night that we got engaged?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, oh yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:What was it called? The down under? It was also called the stowaway at one point. And at some point we used to eat there a lot.
SPEAKER_01:The boo-boo box, I think, was original.
unknown:Originally.
SPEAKER_05:It's all still intact, I've heard, actually.
SPEAKER_01:Really?
SPEAKER_05:Um, our good friend Bridget's boss owns the building.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_05:Anyway, they had a cigarette vending machine in that restaurant. And so when we would be waiting for a table, I just would sit there and play with pushing buttons.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yep.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, those things are gone. You can't, at least here in the United States.
SPEAKER_01:Smoking's not cool anymore. Kind of establishing.
SPEAKER_05:I mean, speak for yourself.
SPEAKER_01:That's true. No maybe no one cool smokes anymore. Cooler people need to start smoking again.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, guys.
SPEAKER_01:Cool. Attention, cool people.
SPEAKER_05:You have a you have a do not start smoking. I we do we don't endorse that. You can do whatever you want, but we're not endorsing it.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. I'll think about it.
SPEAKER_05:All right. So tell me more about getting to the arcades.
SPEAKER_01:Getting to them?
SPEAKER_05:Because you you're not going to be a good thing. Well, I can talk.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. So Right?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Did you still go to them when you could drive?
SPEAKER_01:Yes.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, continue.
SPEAKER_01:I went to Cusar quite a bit. It was in Mayfield. It was a little bit of a hike from where I lived. But uh Yeah. We'd go, people my friends would usually want to like try to pick up girls. I was really looking forward to laser tag and the arcade.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_01:And uh shocker. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Tell the audience at home how many girlfriends you had before we got married.
SPEAKER_01:Before we got ma before we got married.
SPEAKER_05:Before we before me.
SPEAKER_01:I I I I had zero. That's sweet.
SPEAKER_05:He was saying himself, Jesser me. Um yeah. Yeah, that's cool.
SPEAKER_01:Girlfriend, my my uh my what's it called? Uh the incel my incel membership.
SPEAKER_05:I mean it's a little 80s mall sounding.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, no, I was I was very fine with I was uh just mean like the act like going to the mall and hanging out. Yeah, yeah. I They were there for the girls. If it wasn't an arcade, if we were going to a mall that didn't have an arcade, because by the time I started going to the mall, like arcades were kind of dying out. Like honestly, like the console killed the arcade. Because especially once the PlayStation started coming out, it was just uh it was it was going.
SPEAKER_05:Anything we can do to make ourselves lazier. Now we don't even have to leave the house to play video games.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, well that's why we build a little home theater.
SPEAKER_05:That's right. We don't go to the movies anymore.
SPEAKER_01:So I would uh but anyways, I would we I'd go to like EB Games or you know, they still have like a game. This is before this is electronics boutique, is where I used to go.
SPEAKER_05:Was that a store? Yes, or like did they have like sample, like you could do the demo in there? Yeah, like how they do now, still at what's that one store we have?
SPEAKER_01:Uh Games Games Stop, yeah. So, anyways, one of the biggest examples of going to arcade, you start talking about getting there. Yeah. So Magic Mountain, which not to be confused with my brother Joe's incredible gift to Fart on Command. We used to call it Magic Mountain. He'd get up on all fours, put his butt. Had you ever seen him do that?
SPEAKER_05:I've seen your brother do a lot of things. I I I I'm I wouldn't be surprised that I did see it and I wasn't maybe aware at the time that that was Magic Mountain.
SPEAKER_01:What would you think that was like how often do you see that kind of thing?
SPEAKER_05:That you're just like I mean, from the moment that I've got to do it.
SPEAKER_01:Sorry, have you seen him but this whether or not he announced it as Magic Mountain, have you ever seen him put his butt in the air and fart?
SPEAKER_05:Certainly.
SPEAKER_01:Like dozens, if not hundreds of times.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, and then also the well, this is getting too too out of the this is nothing to do with the well, this is actually what we did before cell phones. So couche.
SPEAKER_01:He broke uh we were we wanted to see, so I was listening to Howard Stern, and this had been like high school.
SPEAKER_05:I bet your mom didn't know about maybe middle school.
SPEAKER_01:I think he was playing on like WMS or Buzzard Radio or something like that. Anyways, it doesn't matter.
SPEAKER_05:Maybe you could agree your mom didn't know.
SPEAKER_01:Uh I'm sure she didn't.
SPEAKER_05:Certainly not, is the answer.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so so uh he had somebody on who like set the farting record in five minutes. And we're like, Joe, do you think you beat that? He's like, How many was it? And I don't remember, but it's it was in the hundreds.
SPEAKER_05:Oh gross.
SPEAKER_01:And he's like, Yeah, I could beat that. So it was a sleep, it was a sleeper. I would I had uh John over. Gosh, I think Joe has Jimmy over. Doesn't really matter. But anyways, sorry, Jimmy. Or whoever it was.
SPEAKER_03:Sorry if you weren't sorry if you weren't Jimmy.
SPEAKER_01:So Joe does it, and he destroyed I mean he doesn't destroy it, but he like it's like it's going for speed. So you know he can get loud and long. That's the inner out game. That's a different thing. That's what I started to say, but I didn't want to where he could suck in air so forcefully and loudly. He could he could suck in air as loud as he could blow it out. So he used to play the the inner out game where you have to guess if it was in or out. Anyways. So yeah. So but this is a different one. This is going for speed, so it was like and he I told you the audience won't like it. He devocated.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, I know.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I don't think he'd care of me saying that.
SPEAKER_05:So is that how you guys ended up at the arcade?
SPEAKER_01:Oh, no. That was so Magic Mountain is what that was called. It's not that.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, I I was thinking I'm waiting for you to say, like, you placed bets that he couldn't do it, and so with all their all of your winnings, you went to the arcade. That's not that isn't it though. Magic Mountain is the name of a of an arcade.
SPEAKER_01:Your way, you're okay, yeah. Uh yours makes more sense, but that's not no. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:I should have known better.
SPEAKER_01:You should have known better. So the Magic Mountain, not the Magic Mountain. Magic Mountain. Uh, it's I don't know if they're still around. We went to one.
SPEAKER_05:We did.
SPEAKER_01:Anyways, uh, that was earlier in our marriage.
SPEAKER_05:And did we just go by ourselves?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. We just had a little date there.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, how cute.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So us and all of our closest little buddies children.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, hitting us up for quarters.
SPEAKER_05:Or basically just like taking them off and being like, I can have these.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:I guess you can.
SPEAKER_01:Fun, I guess. Oh, there's is that your mom? Yeah. Good job. Okay, so Magic Mountain, you know, it's got go-karts and uh I think they had maybe batting cages. Anyways. And mini golf. They had a mini golf. They had an arcade. It was a huge arcade. And on Tuesdays, they had it was a quarter. Everything was a quarter. It didn't matter what it was. It could be like the the Daytona.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_01:So during the summer, we would meet uh my brother and I, uh me especially. We would just beg my mom to take us on Tuesdays to Magic Mountain and then any other neighborhood kid who could go.
SPEAKER_05:Just get in the car.
SPEAKER_01:So we yeah, pile in, go to Magic Mountain, and just I just bring all the quarters I had. I mean, we're talking like, you know, twenty bucks plus. Just going crazy. So I would say I would play. Yeah, but so I would play like beat-em-ups, like side-scrolling brawlers, if you will. Like Alien vs. Predator and uh Ninja Turtles, the arcade game. I played the crap out of that, but this is Magic Mountain. I I was mainly playing like Alien vs. Predator, Punisher, kind of the newer breed, Calax and Dinosaurs, like that kind of stuff. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_05:The last one, not so much, but I don't care. Just keep going.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. So uh those games are quarter eaters, especially when you get to the like the bosses.
SPEAKER_05:You keep adding it in to keep going.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_05:Like Shredder when I played like from the Ninja Turtles.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, when I played Shredder. Um Were you Shredder? No, no.
SPEAKER_05:You were fighting Shredder.
SPEAKER_01:Fighting Shredder. He's the final boss.
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:I think it took me like five dollars with like three other guys to to beat him. It was it, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:So what a waste of money.
SPEAKER_01:I disagree.
SPEAKER_05:It led me to where I am today.
SPEAKER_01:X-Men, X-Men arcade game. That was a six-player cabin. But there's a four, there's a four, there was a four-player cabinet and a six-player cabinet that was two screens. So, and that thing, it was not uncommon to play that game with five people.
SPEAKER_05:So, of all of your all of your activities, would you say how much percentage of your time revolved around arcades?
SPEAKER_01:Does that include thinking about going to them?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Uh I 90% of your free time.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like I could live. Wow. I was upset. Like anytime a port, an arcade port would hit a Nintendo. Do you know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I was all about it. Because it it it something in my brain would click that says this would cost me 20 bucks to beat an arcade. Now I can buy it for 50 bucks and play it as much as I want.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, for sure.
SPEAKER_01:You know. So Neo Geo is like the gold standard of what that is. It's the actual arcade, not the not a nerfed version of it graphically.
SPEAKER_05:Your mom dropped you off there or did she stay?
SPEAKER_01:She stayed.
SPEAKER_05:Wow. Even in the 80s?
SPEAKER_01:This would be 90s, yeah. Early 90s.
SPEAKER_05:I was thinking the other night not to totally change the subject from arcades, but when I was in school, there was a lot of blockbusters. There was a lot of no, it's not blockbusters either. My dad you did used to take us to the uh Spring Valley video every Friday.
SPEAKER_01:I remember that. We got uh oh uh Sam Neil uh Escape or Event Horizon.
SPEAKER_05:Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. That was gonna say the scary side of the thing.
SPEAKER_01:That might be the one of the last movies that you and I rented from there.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Or maybe anyone rented from there. That's true. We used to rent pretty regularly, we would rent The Last Unicorn. Jeff Bridges, and America. Any of the Indiana Jones until we got those from McDonald's. We got the uh Temple of Doom, we got that at McDonald's.
SPEAKER_01:You got the actual movie? Yeah. Like in the VHS? Yeah. That's pretty sweet.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. I mean we bought it at McDonald's. I don't know what if what we paid for it, but I'm it wasn't my money. Um and all the Star Wars movies on repeat.
SPEAKER_01:The originals.
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. But what I was gonna say not was not about movies. It was about being at the football game. And where we were we were standing waiting for a pizza delivery this past Friday night, and where we were standing on the corner in front of the school was uh there used to be a payphone there. And then I was thinking about how I would go to the games before I was in marching band or even after marching band, and my parents wouldn't always go, especially if I wasn't in the game, um, and then I would have to go use that payphone to call them to come pick me up. And there was a payphone that used to be a payphone on the corner of the park. And so if we would walk around town after school, kind of like how Clark does, where he just calls us from his phone and I'm just watching his every move on his tracking him everywhere he goes, um, we would have to go and, you know, or like ask a business if you could use the phone to call your parents.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And how much I didn't really do anything I wasn't supposed to be doing, but there were definitely moments where I was like, man, nobody knows where I am right now, and I could just go to this place and I could go to this place as long as I make that phone call and I'm at that pay phone and my parents come.
SPEAKER_01:It's like phone calls like a checkpoint in a video game. Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Totally. And they used to let us, I mean, we would walk, because our football field isn't in a downtown small city, but downtown area. Walk from the football field after the game to a church that was two blocks away, no street lights until you got to the ch church corner block and go to this thing called cellar where we would hang out and it was open till eleven.
SPEAKER_01:Is that at the Catholic Church? It was the Methodist Church. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:And it was their basement, obviously. And they would have like snacks and drinks, and they had ping pong tables and foosball tables, is what they had.
SPEAKER_01:So you're like, okay, I call my mom and dad, I can go to church.
SPEAKER_05:I would usually screw them. I would usually you would hate this because this is we hate this when this happens to us. But I would call them from the football game and be like, the game's over and they'd be like, all right, we're gonna come get you. And I'm like, but can I go to cellar? And they'd be like, ah, yes. And then let me go to cellar. And then they would pick us up at Cellar.
SPEAKER_01:But I mean Well, kudos to kudos to whoever was running Cellar to make children beg their parents to go to church.
SPEAKER_05:Well, it wasn't church, though. I mean, there was no church to it. A church. It was at a church, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Gateway drug.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, to church. I was already deep in. We went to church there at the time, so it was also.
SPEAKER_01:So you walk in and everybody's like, hey, Leslie.
SPEAKER_05:My parents knew all the adults and all that stuff.
SPEAKER_01:My name when I used phones was often uh something like, Hey, my practice is over, come pick me up.
SPEAKER_05:Recall and collect.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:My sister used to do that, and I was always too scared to try. Like, I don't know who I thought was gonna yell at me for doing it, but I didn't know.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, it worked. Um maybe they put some kind of safeguard in place at some point, but I doubt it.
SPEAKER_05:I I bet they weren't putting more resources into payphones as the years went on.
SPEAKER_01:Did you ever I'm assuming you probably never dialed uh a uh phone sex line?
SPEAKER_02:No.
SPEAKER_01:1-800. Do you listen to the messages? So we'd be like in school, like the middle school.
SPEAKER_02:Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_01:Had a payphone. Yeah, we can't. We just like sit around and just like people just rattle off, you know, like 1-800, whatever. And we just try and we just listen to the messages.
SPEAKER_05:Because they're like pretty dirty. I've been alive for a while.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, there's a lot of them. All you gotta do is watch like USA up all night.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Yeah. My friend, I had a friend.
SPEAKER_01:Don't hit that. Susan won't stop it.
SPEAKER_05:My toes are near the computer.
SPEAKER_01:Who knows? It's another foot episode.
SPEAKER_05:I can't think you can see them in the camera though. Nope.
SPEAKER_00:Let me just go ahead and uh anyway, that was a thing.
SPEAKER_05:And I was also thinking about a time when a a kid who had gone to our high school moved away, and he came back to visit our junior year. And I don't know why he ended up in my car, but we kept waiting for someone to meet us at the parking lot to drive us out to this party because I didn't know where it was, and he didn't either. And this person never came. And we did eventually figure it out. It was at it was at Britney's house, and I didn't know how to get out there. It was pretty far out. It was out, you know where the canoe livery is at ro at Bob Evans?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, generally.
SPEAKER_05:Way past that. Like you would turn out on that road, go out there. And I was just like, I would never today sit in a parking lot for an hour and just wait, hoping someone was gonna meet me with like no resources to make a phone call. But we couldn't have called them because we presumably they would have been driving.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And so did you guys party in parking lots?
SPEAKER_05:I never partied really in any capacity, certainly not in public. But there was uh shelter was a place we hang hung out.
SPEAKER_03:Yeah. Spent some time in the Metro Parks.
SPEAKER_05:More in the parking lot of the shelter, not actually getting out in and then there was also courts, which was right next to the to shelter.
SPEAKER_01:Quartz? Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:This will be meaningless for the people listening or watching, but it's down where the kids play Ultimate Frisbee.
unknown:Oh.
SPEAKER_05:That was that's shelter and quartz. No, like basketball courts.
SPEAKER_01:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_05:Quartz and pints. It was a bar.
SPEAKER_01:It was a bar drinks with a Z. It was the Max, actually.
SPEAKER_05:The Max, yeah. And then uh I think people people have always kind of hung out down at the riverfront.
SPEAKER_01:Hmm.
SPEAKER_05:And so you wouldn't know who would be there because you couldn't call ahead and pull out the colour.
SPEAKER_01:Cops could be going back and forth all the time, though, right? Not that did you were you ever never mind.
SPEAKER_05:No, I never didn't. I never met you. Only when I had a car accident.
SPEAKER_01:Wow.
SPEAKER_05:So I don't know what else you got for me.
SPEAKER_01:Oh well. Uh what else do you have?
SPEAKER_05:Because Well, I was thinking too about slumber parties because you kind of mentioned sleepovers and stuff. I mean, our kids definitely have them, but not with the regularity that I used to have them. Because you you're kind of in a vacuum without your friends, or you have your friends over and there's nothing in between, but now they're like, you know, our son plays video games with all his friends online all the time. Um, so I think that probably checks a social box that doesn't need to be in real life. But we would buy each other these books, sleepover books, by do you remember the brand Girl Girl Talk?
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:It was like 70s and 80s, it was huge. They had like a ribbon dancer and all kinds of like workout equipment, like purple dumbbells and walk me through it.
SPEAKER_01:Because I think we're kind of getting a little bit of that Neo Geo territory where I'm starting to figure out is this a book or a game or a game.
SPEAKER_05:Girl Talk was a company.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:And it was like a brand, and it was four teen tween type of girls. And they made sleepover books. You could buy the book and it would have like eat a pickle and mustard sandwich. Yeah. Yeah. And so we would like go through and like circle the ones we wanted to do at the sleepover.
SPEAKER_00:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_05:So that then we would just stay up all night.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Working our way through the girl talk sleepover books.
SPEAKER_01:Nice. Any relation at all to mall madness?
SPEAKER_05:It's very next to. Very adjacent. Yes. I like that word a lot, but I feel like everybody's using it.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. It's girl talk activity. It's good to get some um some good synonyms into the zeitgeist.
SPEAKER_05:It was very much in that same vein of girl activities.
SPEAKER_01:Let's see here. I have uh showing up at people's houses unannounced. Well, that's yeah. It's kind of along the same lines. You want to go there?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, go for it.
SPEAKER_01:Especially when we when people started driving. It's like, let's go over to see if so-and-so's doing it. We wouldn't call them, we'd just go show up.
SPEAKER_05:I feel like that happened a bit more with my sisters uh and her friends than anything I ever did. She sh honestly, she had boys coming to our house all the time. But they weren't boys that wanted to go disgusting. They were they weren't like they just wanted to hang out with her. And she would just go sit in the back, they would just sit in the back of the of the other person's truck.
SPEAKER_01:She's a pretty cool chick.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, and just talk. That happened a lot. I thought it was a me there.
SPEAKER_01:Serenator.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. No, nobody sang to her.
SPEAKER_01:Really?
SPEAKER_05:Not that I'm aware of.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. What was that game we used to play? Uh The River when we go camping. Yeah, this is not exactly well, even then we barely.
SPEAKER_05:We weren't using our phones like we use them now.
SPEAKER_01:This would be like, I think before we even got married.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:So Or even like before we had kids at least. How did that game work? If you We listened to the radio campaign, so we go camping, and there'd be like a dozen people there, right?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:It'd be like a little party in the woods because Dan had the that property that's now the elementary school. Yeah. We're supposed to be a good thing. Go camping.
SPEAKER_05:And then they would play. They'd be playing the river. The radio station was called the River.
SPEAKER_01:It's like a classic rock stuff.
SPEAKER_05:So okay, another like pre radio stations. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Just I mean, I listen to the stuff.
SPEAKER_05:Just stuck listening to what's on the radio.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:For a lot of I mean, so they but the radio, that was like it was like a classic rock.
SPEAKER_01:And then they played like an unedited version. They're like, we don't care on the buzzard. And it'd be like, you know, rage against the machine with like a you know. I never listened to this is a family, sort of a family podcast, so we're pretty light on the profanity, but well there were zero on the profanity.
SPEAKER_05:So far.
SPEAKER_01:We could say a little bit. I talked about phone cigs.
SPEAKER_05:Well, that's not really profanity, that's just two words. Two regular words.
SPEAKER_01:It's fine. Okay. Uh I'll see how far I can push you. Just kidding. I love you.
SPEAKER_05:So it's for my whole life.
SPEAKER_01:No, I we got I want to be behaved, well behave. I want our children to listen to this and be proud of us.
SPEAKER_05:Anyway, the Radio Station the River would play just classic rock. But they would only play like ten bands. Or it was like they would reliably always play like Tom Petty and Yeah, it was like the most But they would also boilerplate classic rock playlists.
SPEAKER_01:I mean, would they also play like Phil Collins and Yeah, it was way more than ten bands, but but I know what you mean.
SPEAKER_05:But those were like those were they weren't going deep, kind of. There's a short list of things that you could expect to hear, thus, every time you hear a blank song on the website.
SPEAKER_01:So everybody picks bands. Mm-hmm. And anytime it correct me if I'm wrong, but uh Dan's gonna kill me if he hears me botch this up.
SPEAKER_05:He'll never listen to this. He eats us. We'll never be cool enough for him.
SPEAKER_01:He's to wait, he's he is the coolest. He's the coolest. He is. Um, so you should buy his pipes too. He makes uh makes custom pipes. Check them out. They're really honestly they're really good. He does well. I'm not a pipe connoisseur.
SPEAKER_05:They are made with love, I could promise you that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Just like the Terry Box.
SPEAKER_01:Just like the Teppy Box Terry Box.
SPEAKER_05:It's not the Teppy Box.
SPEAKER_01:Ah, the Teppy Box.
SPEAKER_05:Anyway.
SPEAKER_01:Anyways. So you pick a band, and if your band comes on, you get to make somebody chug a beer, is that what it is? I don't remember. Or do you drink?
SPEAKER_05:I just thought it was a a drinking game.
SPEAKER_01:Well, this is the way it worked. This is why I thought it was really cool, because you could min-max it. So it worked where not only did it count for okay, so we we just did the traveling wheelberries animal care, which we decided we're gonna redo because the quality. I forgot to turn the mic saw and I'm gonna be able to do that.
SPEAKER_05:The only person in this duo who knows how to work anything forgot to to do the work.
SPEAKER_01:I need to I need to apply the checklist manifesto to my life.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, anyways.
SPEAKER_01:Great book, by the way. Read it and then forget all about it.
SPEAKER_05:When it's time to do something important, time sensitive.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, so so the traveling wheelberries, right? So not only if a Wheelberry song comes on, but like a Dillon song. But a Dylan song, a Tom Petty song, a Tom Petty and a Heartbreaker song, a ELO song.
SPEAKER_05:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, um, you know, Harrison.
SPEAKER_05:I guess it would really depend on like what your goal for the drinking game was.
SPEAKER_01:To just go nuts. To just have a wild gr wonderful. Yeah, that's a good one. And then and then I wasn't smart enough to to know this at the time, but if Jim Keltner was on it, who's the drummer, oh kind of the unofficial Wilbury, he's a sessions musician who's played on like thousands of songs.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So I basically would have been able to just make everybody drink the whole time.
SPEAKER_05:I mean, the whole concept of sending someone into the woods and just seeing them tomorrow.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Is just not a thing anymore.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, especially when you're like sleeping over at oh, we're going camping behind Eric's house for and you're like, oh, okay.
SPEAKER_05:I mean, honestly, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:The worst thing I ever really did, mm, I'm sure my mom's probably like, I think she'll listen to this.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know. My mom will, she'll probably tell her. That's fine. Go ahead.
SPEAKER_05:But it might be different by the time she hears the story. The worst thing, the worst thing though that I did pre-cell phone tracking was um go to one person's house, call from there so it would show up on the caller ID that I was at their house, and then go to someone else's house. And I didn't even do anything bad at the other person's house. I don't even know why. I can't even remember why I did it that way. Yeah. It was. But then I will say I didn't really have that much fun because I was worried all night that my mom was gonna call back and I wasn't gonna be there, and then no one would know where I was, and it really did.
SPEAKER_01:Did you learn your lesson?
SPEAKER_05:I did. It really soured the the night.
SPEAKER_01:Speaking of spending time in the woods, did you ever build a clubhouse? You guys had one.
SPEAKER_05:Well, yeah, but it wasn't in the woods.
SPEAKER_01:True.
SPEAKER_05:But I I spent a lot of time in the house. It was. I did spend a lot of time in the woods. My friends and I would walk in the woods a lot.
SPEAKER_01:What'd your dad walk around like winning the poo with a red polo shirt and no pants on?
SPEAKER_05:I feel like he's well suited for that. Uh one time Holly and I got lost in the woods a day before school started. And no one knew we were lost in the woods.
SPEAKER_01:We were How'd you get lost in the woods?
SPEAKER_05:If you can picture their house, we went where the two barns are now. Okay. There were no no barns. And the only barn was the one out by the garden. But we went straight back behind where those barns are. And I'd never really been that way. And the fence that marked the property was in disrepair. And so I don't think we realized we had crossed into someone else's property. And when we finally came out probably goes pretty far back, huh? That way it doesn't go that far back.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:It's more it's more down to the hillside. But um, by the time we came out, we were like half a mile down the same road they lived on, like on the road. And when we got back home, we were like, Oh my gosh, we're so sorry. My mom was like, Oh, like she had no idea that we had been lost in the woods.
SPEAKER_01:Glad you're back.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. Okay, great.
SPEAKER_01:I kept your meal hot. And just in case you brought your husband took your husband with you, I've made 14 extra plates.
SPEAKER_05:Four extra meals.
SPEAKER_01:So I I we built a clubhouse.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, tell us how you built that clubhouse. Share with us.
SPEAKER_01:This was this was well, we stole uh we stole construction equipment, like mm huge amounts of it.
SPEAKER_05:Like to build your clubhouse.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, and I will say innocently, like I think we all sort of knew that we that they didn't want us to take, you know, boxes of a thousand nails.
SPEAKER_05:Right. It's kind of like taking a pen from work.
SPEAKER_01:We've made a million. So this is what happened. My parents were like, we were like, we want to build a fort. Could we I don't know if you guys ever seen like a new build house, but especially if it's like it doesn't matter if it's custom. Any house is gonna produce just massive amounts of scrap wood.
SPEAKER_05:So we're like about that.
SPEAKER_01:No. So my parents were like, if you take it the scrap from the scrap wood pile, that's fine. You guys go ahead. But it wasn't there, no one's gonna care.
SPEAKER_05:It was just like a house in your house.
SPEAKER_01:It was our neighbor's house, yeah. Yeah. And it's just like a huge pile of scrap, like it looks like trash. Like you could take from that. I'm sure no one's gonna care. So we're like, cool. So you start taking scrap wood. Oh, what's that over there that's sort of next to the scrap wood? Looks like they left their whatever finishing. We didn't even know. We'd just be like, this might come in handy. You know, we just walk off with it.
SPEAKER_05:Just grab, you know, some supplies.
SPEAKER_01:So we're at night, we're at uh we're getting we were uh rein up, uh re-apped our supplies, and it was kind of like dusk, and we're in there.
SPEAKER_05:You basically found a construction worker because cash.
SPEAKER_01:Well, the construction worker found us. Oh he was pissed in the dark. Like he like threatened to call the cops. And at the time we're like, How old were you? Oh geez. Like fifth, sixth grade, 10, 11, 12. 12, maybe 12.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, okay. So not super old.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And like I was like one of the oldest ones. So I mean he chased us out, threatened to call the cops, never come back, that whole thing.
SPEAKER_05:Which he was 100%. You built it?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we built a clubhouse.
SPEAKER_05:Did he find you in your clubhouse or at the club?
SPEAKER_01:No, we were back at the real house pulling jack moves. I mean, we were just like, hey, what's this? Oh yeah, get that. You know, that kind of stuff. Like eventually, had he never showed up, we probably would have just started taking like any power tools that were like, we may need it, we'll bring it back. You know, a dumb and dumber logic. Like, hang on to this one. It's a car. Like, we know we need a bathroom. We're just poured a pot toilet. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:We might need a motorcycle to drive back and forth.
SPEAKER_01:No, let's just this house is just built here.
SPEAKER_05:It's already a clubhouse for us. Yeah. Let's just move it up.
SPEAKER_01:Just crash. We'll be like uh Randy Quaid. He got uh, I think he got in trouble for what do you call it? Squatting. Squatting. Yeah. Poor guy, cousin Eddie. Anyways, so that was fun. But that was a good time. Like we would ch we spent a ton of time in that clubhouse because we were all like super proud of it. It was ext it was a death trap.
SPEAKER_05:Was it in the trees?
SPEAKER_01:No, but it was built around like built kind of into the trees on the ground. You could walk up. We made like a little makeshift ladder, so you can walk up on the roof and hang out on that. But we just we we'd be so we'd be like bored just sitting on the on the top of the roof, and a kid would just be driving nails, like dozens of nails while talking, just into absent-mindedly into the roof. So if you went underneath there, it looked like the chokey box.
SPEAKER_05:There's just live nail ends everywhere.
SPEAKER_01:Like a freaking iron maiden. Yeah, we're just like what's the sharp end in the room? Somebody would come in there for the first time would be like, just watch your head, and it'd be like just nails, like so dangerous. Like just nail and deadly. I found a mouse and yeah, so dangerous and deadly.
SPEAKER_05:You found a dead mouse? Did it had it impaled itself on?
SPEAKER_01:Not a dead mouse. We found I found a mouse.
SPEAKER_05:Are you gonna tell me a story I don't want to hear? That the audience won't like?
SPEAKER_01:Uh it's kind of sweet.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01:But it's sad.
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:It's a Disney movie.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, is this mom dead?
SPEAKER_01:Uh no, it's a baby dead. The baby dead.
SPEAKER_05:The mom left the I'm struggling to think of a Disney movie where the baby dies.
SPEAKER_01:That'd be a nice change.
SPEAKER_05:That's awful. We don't think that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, just Disney stuff.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Animals.
SPEAKER_05:Dead animals.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, where do you think your meat comes from?
SPEAKER_05:Okay. I haven't had any meat all day.
SPEAKER_01:Because you knew we were gonna talk about this?
SPEAKER_05:Mm-hmm. I wanted to be able to be virtuous. I've got upright.
SPEAKER_01:I can't eat this dead baby mouse anymore. I don't want to be able to do it. Even though it looks delicious.
SPEAKER_05:How'd the how to die?
SPEAKER_01:I tried it, so the mom left it.
SPEAKER_05:Did it leave a note pinned to its baby mouse blanket?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it was on the uh never mind. I'm gonna go back in the hook. Never mind. Um she uh I don't know. I don't know what the mom was thinking. She's just scared, mother, she was scared. It's prom mouse prom night.
SPEAKER_05:Um mouse prom Did she live in in Peter Griffin's basement? Yeah. No.
SPEAKER_01:My beloved.
SPEAKER_02:Not my beloved.
SPEAKER_01:That's just terrible. All right. So we uh no, it wasn't that the mouse didn't talk. Mouse might have talked. We didn't see the mouse. Oh, oh it could have talked. It could have been like the mouse could have been like when we when I took the baby mouse into my house. The mouse could have been like, no. So so I took the mouse.
SPEAKER_04:I was just at the store buying it groceries. I was coming back.
SPEAKER_01:It's terrible. My mom's not gonna listen to this anymore.
SPEAKER_05:She's part of the audience.
SPEAKER_01:So she she remembers this though.
SPEAKER_05:Because I was you brought a mouse into the house.
SPEAKER_01:I wanted to nurse the mouse back to health. I felt terrible for it. I wanted to try to help it because it was like dying. So I had it for like two days. I went, there was a lady, a neighbor lady down the road who I heard through somebody else, somebody else's mom, that she's a huge animal lover, and she like nurses squirrels and chipmunks and stuff that like get hurt in her yard. So I brought the mouse to her house, introduced myself. Um she was all about helping us. She had like a tiny little milk dropper. Dropper of sorts. It's probably just a dropper. Some milk. She's like, only put milk in this.
SPEAKER_05:Only mouse milk. Only mouse milk.
SPEAKER_01:And uh she told me like what you know what kind of uh formula to use and that kind of stuff. Anyways. So I really tried to bring this mouse back to health.
SPEAKER_05:You should have left it in her care.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, she should have volunteered.
SPEAKER_05:What's her name? Okay, let's go nurse her back to health.
SPEAKER_01:Some sort of female dog of sorts.
SPEAKER_05:Oh no.
SPEAKER_01:No, she was very it was it's a nice it was nice of her. But you're right. You're right though. She probably should have. She was probably glad when you left. She's like, I like I actually like everything but mice. I like all baby animals except effing mice.
SPEAKER_05:Effing baby mice.
SPEAKER_01:Effing baby mice. Get these effing baby mice off my mother. Get these off my mother effing milk droppers. Droplets.
SPEAKER_04:Drop stolen club house.
SPEAKER_01:So the mouse died after a couple days. I was pretty sad about it. I had like pet? I'm trying to think when when was it Minnie or Cindy?
SPEAKER_04:Which one? Which one was the boy?
SPEAKER_01:Cindy, the okay. Crap.
SPEAKER_05:These were hamsters, right?
SPEAKER_01:My sister's hamsters. Julie's hamsters. Julie's nine years younger than me. She had a uh a hamster named Minnie. I think Minnie was the first one. Minnie had gigantic testicles that would it basically sit on them like a beanbag chair. Like basically it looked like that episode of South Park where Randy's hopping around, everybody's microwaving their testicles so they can get prescription marijuana.
SPEAKER_03:Oh god.
SPEAKER_01:And they're hopping around up like their pogo sticks. Anyways, it looked like that. And we'd feed it spaghetti, and it would just sit there with a full display. Suck it up on a spaghetti.
SPEAKER_05:Did your parents think it was funny?
SPEAKER_01:Oh yeah. Oh yeah, for sure. Wouldn't you?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:But I mean, did everyone think it was funny for the same reason?
SPEAKER_01:Oh yeah. Yeah. We thought balls were funny as soon as we knew what they were called. Peabut eggs? Think about Clark, yeah, peabut eggs. So um Julia, you know, she was I don't know how old she was, like four. So she wanted I found I was down in the basement because Nintendo was down there. And uh saw Minnie and oh, we were looking for Minnie. I found her in a bucket full of water floating at the top. Julia wanted to give her a bath, forgot to take her out. It's terrible. That was kind of devastating. Oh, yeah. That was like the first time because it wasn't my hamster, but like it just, you know, it sucks. It's sad. Yeah, it's sad. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:My parents let me try to. My dad and mom let me try to save a baby bunny one time that our dog brought up to the house. It did not live.
SPEAKER_01:Is that the one that the dog just goring?
SPEAKER_05:Those were our pets.
SPEAKER_01:Oh. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:This was just like a wild bunny that the dog had found, a different uh starlight had found.
SPEAKER_01:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah. I mean, honestly, there's lots of time spent outdoors that isn't spent outdoors, no matter your feelings on technology.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Outside, we played outside, played roller hockey constantly. I'm sure kids still do that to live in cul-de-sacks with it. Because it we'd roll with like the age gap between the folks hanging out would be huge.
SPEAKER_05:Because you just play with whoever's available.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I'd go play with a kid who's like four grades lower than me.
SPEAKER_05:You know, I had a summer where I would drive, I would ride my bike down to the city.
SPEAKER_01:Especially if it had a good video game console. I'd be like, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, we can hang out.
SPEAKER_05:Sure. Best friends.
SPEAKER_01:Can we play an entire season of Techno Super Bowl?
SPEAKER_05:I want that.
SPEAKER_01:Oh yeah, let's do it. No, that Dan, I used to hang out with Dan. He was a couple grades lower than me, but we'd his parents let him watch like all our rated movies. Oh wow. We let him have every video game ever. He had an older brother in high school, so we were always listening to like metal and I had a friend where all of Death Rose greatest.
SPEAKER_05:All of the worst things I ever saw were at her house. Like it. And I mean I was in in elementary school and I saw it and it was terrifying. Yeah, the like the T V mini series. Is that what it was? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:And they'd be like, Oh, what are you watching? Like the uh be like, oh, have fun.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, that's uh I need to read that book.
SPEAKER_05:It's good. It's a great book.
SPEAKER_01:Is it good? What's your favorite Stephen King book?
SPEAKER_05:Gosh, I've read so many of them.
unknown:Wow.
SPEAKER_05:Well this is gonna make me sound so stupid and terrible, but they're all super good, but they all have a evoke a similar feeling. And then I can't remember what book was what.
SPEAKER_01:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_05:But I've read all of his like original bestsellers. I never read any of his sci-fi though. Or fantasy. Fantasy. Are they called Watchtower?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Oh, is it what but Dark Tower?
SPEAKER_05:The Dark Tower. I've never read any of whatever those tower books are.
SPEAKER_01:Watchtower is a Jehovah's Witness uh book thing. Oh along the book. He wrote that.
SPEAKER_04:I was like, what?
SPEAKER_01:Oh my gosh, knock on the door. Holy crap, Stephen King.
SPEAKER_05:What was the is that a family guy episode too where he's just like grabbing random things?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, he's like, it's a lamp and then uh texty's like I'll see what I think that's pretty it's pretty accurate, actually.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, he's very loved everyone I've ever read. I've been they've all been page turners.
SPEAKER_01:Heck of a writer.
SPEAKER_05:Reading was another thing I did a lot more of before.
SPEAKER_01:I did not. But cliff notes I have on here. You can talk about reading though if you want.
SPEAKER_05:Like I can, but it's been an hour.
SPEAKER_01:Do we care? Do you care?
SPEAKER_05:Do we want to uh we should probably I mean I definitely read a whole lot of books.
SPEAKER_01:Well, could can let me let me seg let me break up our topic that'll segue us into the concert that we've been standing in line here for an hour. Yeah. When are they gonna open the doors? I have to pee.
SPEAKER_05:You know what I mean? Just go ahead.
SPEAKER_01:We do have a bathroom in our studio.
SPEAKER_05:We do.
SPEAKER_01:Connecting.
SPEAKER_05:If you're not watching us on YouTube, you wouldn't know that we're in a closet right now.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. A primary closet.
SPEAKER_05:But if you are watching us on YouTube, you could see all of my clothes.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. Wow. They're color-coded.
SPEAKER_05:And it's funny that we put the sheet up here. Because there's nothing behind here.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I thought we were doing it for acoustics.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, we were, weren't we? Yeah. I just didn't want people looking at my stuff.
SPEAKER_01:The nothing back there? They don't want you to know that you don't have anything there.
SPEAKER_05:I want you to think that this is a bank bowl full of on the wall. Banksy. Yeah. What's that?
SPEAKER_01:The you know, the artist, the London.
SPEAKER_05:Oh. No. It's the name of an artist?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:Sorry everyone, I'm from rural Southeast Roma.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, so discovering music. I no.
SPEAKER_05:Go ahead. I'll I'll weigh in on my experience with that.
SPEAKER_01:Well, one of my favorite things to do once I could drive was go to because again, you know, we we didn't have um can't just look up in the internet.
SPEAKER_05:What's the newest thing?
SPEAKER_01:This was like before Napster. I mean, before like periods. Yeah, like right before Napster. Even of course, even when Napster came out, that was amazing, by the way. But but even then it was like you'd still go to the you'd still go buy CDs and stuff. Yeah, because you yeah, anyways, it's a whole other conversation. I could also talk about things like AOH and uh wares and anyways, I'm not going to. That's another conversation. I'll have a whole AOH episode, probably.
SPEAKER_05:Okay, I don't know what that is.
SPEAKER_01:I can't the crap I did on the internet as a middle school kid was horrific. Great. It was just but you could hit a button and just punt people offline and create accounts out of nothing with like your credit card generators and stuff like that. It was just this application, you just hit buttons.
SPEAKER_05:And the all I hear when you talk is just wasted potential.
SPEAKER_01:Well, it got me in computers.
SPEAKER_05:Had your well, I guess that's true, but maybe a little sooner would have been better for you.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I wasn't that bad. My friends were worse, but I would give them the mouse and watch.
SPEAKER_05:So anyway, discovering music was a lot harder.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, you'd have to so this is this is this was my system, more or less. I'd buy an album, yeah, I'd go to this place called the Disc Den. I doubt it exists still in Solon, Ohio. And I cannot remember the owner's name. I loved the dude. I don't think I don't think I ever actually knew his name. He was kind of like he was at, you know, he swore he was cool.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:You know, he had just tons of crazy paraphernalia in his. Uncle Dan was cooler. This guy, this guy was cool to a high school kid.
SPEAKER_02:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:Like, Uncle Dan would be cool to this the the parent of a high school kid.
SPEAKER_04:Now, Uncle Dan.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, at the time, yeah, Uncle Dan was cool.
unknown:But yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Anyways, so I would talk to him about what was out, you know, and he'd tell me, or like, oh, you like this guy? Check this out.
SPEAKER_02:Word of mouth.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Totally. And we'd talk about these things, and and you know, nothing a record store owner would rather talk about than music, music, especially the stuff they like. So you get them going on it, and you just learn tons of stuff. You find so I'd okay, I'll I'll check what album would you like, you know. Like Bob Dylan, for instance. I was like, I got Bob Dylan Dylan's greatest hits, I have volume one, two, and three. What would be like a good album? He'd be like, Well, what kind of stuff do you like? And I'd say, and he'd be like, he'd like, you want to listen to Blood on the Tracks. So he's like, get Blood on the Tracks is like his best album. Most people think so. So I'd listen to that.
SPEAKER_05:Everyone thinks so.
SPEAKER_01:Everyone thinks so. Or or I'd or I'd once I had a CD I like, I'd check the liner notes and I'd see like who they thinked. Because I'd like to be like, they'd list like their inspirations, so then I'd go back, take a deep dive.
SPEAKER_05:I never did anything like this. I just listened to the radio.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I mean, yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I mean I it wasn't for me, music discovery didn't happen until I went to college.
SPEAKER_01:Gotcha. Oh, I mean, and I definitely I mean it's not like I knew a ton.
SPEAKER_05:I knew a lot for I think you probably knew more than an average high schooler.
SPEAKER_01:For sure. Yeah, I definitely did.
SPEAKER_05:I mean, we listened to a lot of musicals and a lot of oldies, you know, like what my mom likes.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I I hated oldies. I went through a 90s country stage, like Garth Brooks.
SPEAKER_01:Okay, I never hit the country.
SPEAKER_05:And then it was like I was heavy into the pop. I discovered Michael Jackson when I was in high school, and then I went through an obsession, as you know, for a very long time. That was my what was that? My AOL name?
SPEAKER_01:Oh yeah, MJ fan.
SPEAKER_05:L A L M J fan. Yeah, yeah. So And you liked to make it meet people think it was Michael Jordan.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. And it was not a little joke. Magic Johnson.
SPEAKER_05:You got the coolest name and then you changed your name to something terrible.
SPEAKER_01:Mm-hmm. I can't say it.
SPEAKER_05:No.
SPEAKER_01:Can I?
SPEAKER_05:No.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. Okay, so uh I would uh no, I I I want to clarify, I did not actually hate oldies. I I tried to push them out of my life because it's all I was allowed to listen to. I was like the Napergatsy sketch, or just like CDs were snapped in my house, that sort of thing. And uh so what was I saying?
SPEAKER_05:Uh you were talking about how we're gonna transition into targeting.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, yeah. Anyways, I'd listen to Jawan. I'd listen to uh gang tons of gangster app. I'd find the worst possible stuff I could find. Like you know, Scarface and Ghetto Boys.
SPEAKER_05:Were you also in an 80 sitcom?
SPEAKER_01:MCA Spice One movie. Um was I in one?
SPEAKER_05:You just sound like you're describing like I'm not allowed to listen to this, so I'm gonna find the worst thing to live to extend.
SPEAKER_01:It was like a you know rebellion. Sort of, yeah. But also like a fascination. I was very fast. I was like, how bad can things get? Like how what can you get away with, you know?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, I guess. I never we're just pretty different, things like that. I I never had those thoughts and or any interest.
SPEAKER_01:But I always loved oldies. And I just can't I can't escape oldies. I love them.
SPEAKER_05:They're just in your DNA.
SPEAKER_01:They feel if it's weird, it feels like like when I hear a 50s or a 60s song, it brings me back to my childhood in a way that I would imagine somebody who's 70s in their 70s would just because that's all I ever loved to my mom.
SPEAKER_05:Yeah, Zippo in the morning. He used to play all that stuff.
SPEAKER_01:Well, did you ever listen to any Herb Alperts?
SPEAKER_05:No. I probably did because when you play it, it's familiar to me. Yeah. But not like how I've listened to it since you and I have been on road trips together.
SPEAKER_01:I have definitely it's one of those, one of those dudes who I've I'd be listening to it as a kid, but wouldn't know who it was, you know. So I feel like I've always known some of his work, but it actually wasn't until I was working at ICC in Columbus. So I was what, 25, something like that. And my boss, Jason, had an album. Jason would, I love Jason. He would uh the one of his he would I don't know how to describe it. If he had a CD, he could listen to the same CD over and over and over and over and over again, and it would just play. And I didn't care if it was good music. It's not like he would refuse to play anything else, but if all we had was one CD in the office, it was just gonna get played every time. And uh so until we got a new one, that was it. That's that was it.
SPEAKER_05:So was that a Herb Albert?
SPEAKER_01:It was Herb Albert ReWhipped. Alright, so whipped cream and other delights is is what Lady Fingers is on.
SPEAKER_02:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:It's a 1965 album, we'll talk about in a second. Rewipped is a bunch of like hip-hop producers and you know jazz fusion guys, uh they put together a remixed, all the songs remixed.
SPEAKER_03:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:So they got the hip-hop beats. I played to the Ladyfingers. Yeah. That was actually so the first time I heard Ladyfingers is more than likely John Modeschi's version. Are you familiar with Modesky, Martin and Wood?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I saw them once.
SPEAKER_05:Do they play guitars?
SPEAKER_01:No, they don't, actually. Well, they played with John Schofield for a while. Okay, anyways.
SPEAKER_05:Just uh I don't know.
SPEAKER_01:He's a he he's he plays the keys, he's a ridiculous keyboard player. Uh pianos, all sorts of crap. He's like an avant-garde crazy level. Anyways, so he did his version of Lady Fingers. I think he did it. I think that was him. I love that song. It's an infectious melody. I eventually, like, not too long after, went and got the original um whipped cream and other the lights album, and then listened to I knew all the songs, but they got they're you know, obviously older sounding so uh Herb Alpert did it says the T in the Tijuana Brass, but his early stuff, I think this album included, there really wasn't the Tijuana Brass. They came as a result of when he started touring big. When he started getting big and needed a touring band. So if you see on the cover of uh Here Come the Brass, which is an album I like a lot, he it's him and like a bunch of dudes, and I think they're all wearing like kind of mariachi-ish. Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:So Tijuana looked like the Tijuana Brass.
SPEAKER_01:So they they there were it was an actual band, but it wasn't at the time of this. Gotcha. It was just a name. And so what he did, like any horns you hear on the album, I think are all him.
SPEAKER_05:Wow.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And what he did was hired the wrecking crew. Do you familiar with them? They were okay.
SPEAKER_05:So they were they were like a football I mean either.
SPEAKER_01:I think there was a football team called the Wrecking Crew, maybe.
SPEAKER_05:No, I'm thinking of what are they Oh, that's the dog pound. Yeah. I love sports. There's a reason we're not playing a football game at the end of every episode.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Hmm. Anyways. No, no interest, not a big football guy. Uh unless it's like Blitz or Techno Super Bowl. Then I'll play you.
SPEAKER_05:I don't want to play. Please don't make me play a video game sport.
SPEAKER_01:I don't feel Blitz.
SPEAKER_05:There was one where you could like play it with our son and then invite him on for a special hour.
SPEAKER_01:In season mode, you could send like prostitutes and like like my jaws on the floor. To your opponent to you to people you're playing in the next game, and their stats would get lowered.
SPEAKER_05:Was it like a TV 14 rating?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it was probably MA. MA. I think Lawrence Taylor was like, do you know who that is? No, no. Okay, back to Herb Albert. So the Wrecking Crew. The Wrecking Crew was like this. I don't know. There's a word for what it was. Was this like organization of um, I don't know if the labor union's the right thing? Probably not. Probably like, do you know how like the comic book artists used to kind of get commissioned back in the early days of Marvel, like Kirby and no, okay. So basically, they're just all elite level players. This guy's like Keltner. I don't think he was actually in the wrecking crew. Maybe he was, I don't know. But uh Hal Bain was. He was a drummer for the wrecking crew that was on like everything. And he, anyways, so let's say you're Hal Bain. Or uh what's the girl's name?
SPEAKER_05:We could just go with Hal Bain.
SPEAKER_01:Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Keep going. I'm Hal Bain.
SPEAKER_01:Somebody needs uh Herb Alpert's like, I got an album. I need do you have one? So we need a drummer. Okay. I think they charge like whatever, 150 bucks an hour or something. And they would play and they'd be on these tracks. They don't get royalties. I'm sure some of them probably structured it later, but they it's the whole like session musician life. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I got it. Where are we going with it? He hired the wrecking crew. Okay.
SPEAKER_01:It's not the Tijuana Brass that you hear.
SPEAKER_05:Not Tijuana Brass.
SPEAKER_01:Not the Tijuana Brass.
SPEAKER_05:It's the Wrecking Crew.
SPEAKER_01:It's the Wrecking Crew.
SPEAKER_05:Huh.
SPEAKER_01:So it's a bunch of Guns for Hire. Gotcha. Which is a cool documentary on session musicians.
SPEAKER_05:That's cool.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So anyways, um, like this album kind of exploded, I think, because of the have you seen the cover of it? Look up the cover. Yeah, you know if you saw it. Just look it up now. What's it what's the case? I think probably half the reason. I I wasn't obviously alive then.
SPEAKER_05:You've said a lot of names of things.
SPEAKER_01:Whip cream and other delights.
SPEAKER_05:Making sure.
SPEAKER_01:So I think probably half the reason for the success, because Herb Alper was a brilliant businessman. Yeah. It's a woman covered whipped cream.
SPEAKER_05:Wow.
SPEAKER_01:So people were probably, you know, this is the 60s.
SPEAKER_05:Her name was Dolores Erickson.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:I don't know much about her, but is she still she was born on December, September 1935. And she's still ticking? Eh, I don't let's see. I don't see that she's dead.
SPEAKER_01:Well, okay.
SPEAKER_05:I'll keep looking to see if she's dead while you keep talking about her.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know much about her. She's um hideous. Not interested. And also, you know, lactose intolerance, sugar. No thanks.
SPEAKER_05:Um Yes, she's still alive.
SPEAKER_01:Hey, good for her. What do you go, Dolores? I'm just kidding. You're cute.
SPEAKER_05:She is. It says she's only 77. That's a lot of things.
SPEAKER_01:I wouldn't kick you out of my ice cream Sunday.
SPEAKER_05:She's okay, she's 89.
SPEAKER_01:Nice. Nice. All right.
SPEAKER_05:So that's what we're doing.
SPEAKER_01:Remember the Grand Budapest Hotel?
SPEAKER_05:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Remember the guy who was like uh I think he was the main character. He wasn't he didn't have a thing for real like very old women. Yeah, he did.
SPEAKER_05:So if we're not watching a movie for the par purpose of talking about it or writing a report on it, I'm not I'm I just am in the moment and then I forget it.
SPEAKER_01:Gotcha. That's okay. Okay.
SPEAKER_05:Alright. So we're gonna play for you.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, okay. Yeah. Right? Yeah, yeah. We're not gonna talk about Herb Alpert anymore.
SPEAKER_05:And how we made like if I said you have five sentences left to say about Herb Alpert, what would it be?
SPEAKER_01:Herb Alpert started AM Records. Okay. He he and another guy, I can't remember his name. Uh Moss, Jerry Moss, maybe.
SPEAKER_05:Randy Moss.
SPEAKER_01:Randy Moss. That's innocent account. I'm too deep. Um he played all his stuff, worked with session musicians, got the album company going, hired tons of folks, had big names on it, like the carpenters were on there, and I think maybe Carol King and the police and all. He basically plus all he had tons of like hip-hop samples and stuff like Biggie used some of his stuff. Anyways, uh Rise. He sold the company for like$500 million back in the 80s. Whoa. Since he's probably an amazing businessman, I'm sure that grew into a massive fortune. I have no idea what he's doing.
SPEAKER_05:He's still alive.
SPEAKER_01:He is.
SPEAKER_05:How old is he?
SPEAKER_01:He's still tours. Like very small clubs. He's like 91.
SPEAKER_05:Dude. How are we gonna get you to see him?
SPEAKER_01:I would love to see him.
SPEAKER_05:If you're listening to this herps, my granddad loved him, apparently.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:If you're listening to this old herpes, try to get Rob to take it to your children.
SPEAKER_01:If you're growing on the face of a podiatrist. By the way, I'm starting to think he's not a I'm starting to think he's not a real doctor.
SPEAKER_05:I know. At least he's not doing a very good job following his own doctoring advice.
SPEAKER_01:So yeah, we're gonna play this. I love this song. It's an infectious melody for me. You know, I love pretty, of simple, pretty music. Right, I love Cinderella soundtrack.
SPEAKER_05:That's true. I was just thinking about that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I like I like pretty songs. I'm kind of wired. I don't know if I'm yeah, it's just weird. Uh it's not it's not weird, everybody does. But I'm like specifically go after them. I love them. I could listen to the song. Um, this is the kind of song that if it was playing on hold music, uh I would maybe ask. I would hope that I had like a 40-minute cue.
SPEAKER_05:I would just probably also ask the receptionists if they could tell you what that music was.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. Honestly, I I I've said multiple times, you guys have awesome hold music. They're like, thanks. I I didn't I never actually hear it. I don't actually know ever call us.
SPEAKER_05:I'm always here already.
SPEAKER_01:But I I just love it. And it's simple, and uh Herb Albert's songs are not they're not always they're always they always have a they're always catchy. But by the way, he's the only one to read to have a number one hit in both instrumental and vocals.
SPEAKER_05:What's his vocal song? Does he sing?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_05:This is an instrumental song.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, it's an instrumental song. Uh, This Guy's in Love With You.
SPEAKER_05:Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01:It's Burr Backrack song.
unknown:Oh.
SPEAKER_05:Batch Ratch.
SPEAKER_01:Batch ratch. Batch ratchet.
SPEAKER_05:All right.
SPEAKER_01:And clank.
SPEAKER_05:I gotta stand up before my butt falls asleep.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So you gotta go on YouTube. You gotta go on YouTube to hear this song because of licensing issues. By the way, I have no idea how I haven't started publishing anything yet. I hope we can publish on YouTube. I keep saying that because ChatGPT told me that we would not have any hangups, and I did get into it a little bit.
SPEAKER_05:Okay.
SPEAKER_01:So someday this will be out there. We'll link to it in the can't publish it on YouTube.
SPEAKER_05:They'll just have to come watch us when we are live at Wembley.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, that's right.
SPEAKER_05:After we finish Wimbledon. I just want to clarify Wimbledon is the name of the tournament. It's not a place. Is that right?
SPEAKER_01:You're I'm gonna say yes. Did you look it up after No.
SPEAKER_05:Why would I do that? It's not like I have the whole world in my pocket. But I just wanted to say that.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, you're probably right. I don't know.
SPEAKER_05:But but I don't think it moves. It's always in the same place. But it's like Wimbledon out.
SPEAKER_01:So it's definitely a tournament.
SPEAKER_05:Definitely the name of a tournament. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I don't know if it's also the name of a place or not.
SPEAKER_05:I don't either.
SPEAKER_01:I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_05:You played tennis. You were a high school tennis star.
SPEAKER_01:I spent a lot of time behind the rec center doing uh things that did not require a cell phone.
SPEAKER_05:Learning about how to find new music.
SPEAKER_01:Sorry. So yeah. Um we'll go ahead and uh stop this.
SPEAKER_05:Okay. We can take off our headphones too.